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Friday, February 03, 2017

Savory Peppercorn Victory Sauce

Jan. 26-Feb. 2, 2017
4 Win Streak
(Record 10-9-0)

You can age a steak for months in the right conditions, but you leave the milk on the table one night and you will be eating your cereal dry.  Aging and conditioning (decades of it)  has proven to be the combination needed to take down the top A division teams.  Every Strawb is firing on all steam pistons. Every play is planned, even the ones where the opponent scores.  Every shot, pass, check, swear word now carefully executed so the Strawbs can crush the top crust teams while coasting into the playoffs in comfortable beer league fashion and still land in the B seed.  

First it was the Chiefs whose on ice council meeting failed to unanimously vote in a winning effort.  Then the under-age beer leagueing Jager Bombers suffered a sobering loss. Their stomachs were later pumped due to Kool-aid poisoning.  OH YA.  Who can forget about last night's pathetic gaggle of geese whose pecking and puck quaking was no match for Killer Strawberry Grade-A steak style hockey grilled to perfection.  The newly branded Puck Hogs (Free Agents) played with passion, but ... if not for fear of tetanus from their rusted out skate blades, the score might have been much higher against.  Perhaps given 10-20 more free penalty shots, the outcome may have been different.


Putting aside all that, there is the magnificent executive scoring talent and boastful offensive defense portfolio put together by the Mayor, the Rousey and the Shinny, and did I mention the gratuitous skill and speed from the Strawbs executive Magboy, Shinny and Slickery?  


Again putting that all aside, Dr Thug's skill has been peaking like a pressure cooker releasing its fragrance and overboosting release of scoring celebrating plenitude.  


Wallee the Rookee of the Year is blowing the zamboni doors off each night with his Tyson Degrasse speed and his shark like blood thirst for red posts.  


Turn Around Turner's run for Rookie of the Year isn't over either. His pacifistic enforcement style and robust ability to lay down from line to line, block shots, poke pucks to thwart offence has earned him the unofficial, yet to be popularized moniker of the Turnernator for his Turner style termination of the opponent's offensive chances.   When Joe-so-Rousey takes a "hasta la vista" on his defense partner, you know what Turnernator will say, "I'll be BACK... here".  He has also been overheard supporting his fellow opponents who happen to be enrolled and heavily reliant on assistance such as The Income Assistance Program and Employment Insurance. Thanks for your support.


Both Marquis de Save and Joey Laporte et Fermé (never defeated) have literally shut the doors on the league's former best better teams. 


With only 2 games left until the split, the Strawbs look to defeat the Slingers and the Flying Hawaiians whom we have never beaten before.  


The team convened several times at the usual watering hole.  3 Stellas, 2 Bud, 2 Northern ale,  a basket of strange beige things, 15 chicken parts and 1 lemon slice were consumed. The team card earned 83 points and NO! Phil did not show up in the second washroom stall at 11:15 Sharp on Mon. Jan 30 for manly discussions over best Strawberry penalties ever.


2 comments:

Rob Greenfield said...

Great Stuff Strawbs!!
Make sure you stay in the B Pool.
MAgBoy - I hope you don't mind, but I did edit your post for grammar.

The Vice

DB said...


As long as you keep an open mind to opening your establishment up again for this years soiree you can edit anything you like.